I’m a thinker. I spend a lot of time inside of my head. Do you? I used to think everyone did, but then I learned that while I’m not alone, I’m probably not in the majority. When I’m spending time in my head, I’m being curious. I’m wondering. I’m dreaming, planning, examining. I find that a majority of the time when I’m living in my head I’m trying to solve some kind of problem: Why don’t I have a primary relationship? What could I do to help my career be progressing instead of stagnating? How do I get rid of this belly fat? What is the best way to be a person of faith? I know, simple questions, right? Ha!
Spending time in my head is a lot like constantly having several apps open and working in the background at all times. It can lead to feeling like I need more RAM, as if my engine is working too hard, that something’s gotta give.
I’m learning that the something that’s gotta give is me.
My awesome therapist has helped me to reduce my thinking about life as some kind of problem that needs to be solved. That life is more of an experience in which I’m being invited to participate, rather than an experiment for which I’m in charge of finding a solution. Life isn’t my problem to solve. I can’t tell you the relief that truth brings.
What Do You Do When Your Engine Is Overheating?
Writing things down helps me tremendously to get some relief when it feels like there’s too much swirling around inside my noggin. Someone once told me, “When you start to feel crazy, grab some paper and make four lists: Mad, Sad, Glad, and Afraid. What are you mad about, glad about, sad about, and afraid of? Separating out all the different emotional forces at play in my brain…and seeing it splayed out on paper in front of me…is incredibly freeing. After I do this exercise I usually say to myself, “Oh, it makes total sense now why I’m feeling so discombobulated!”
What About Our Life of Faith?
Yes, I can also overthink everything that relates to God, the Bible, church, theology, and what my response to all of it should be. I love that Jesus offers a simple answer, especially for people like me who like to complicate things.
In Matthew 22, Jesus was asked by one of the Pharisees (an expert in religious law, probably an overthinker), “Teacher, which is the most important commandment in the Law?”
Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.”
How to keep it simple? Love God and love people.
I’ll also add that since Jesus said “…as yourself,” I believe we also need to love ourselves. What Jesus said here implies that you’ll only be able to love other people to the extent that you love yourself.
I hope this essay gives you permission to give yourself a break today. To not have to figure everything out. To not have a solution to all of life’s pressing issues. But also to remember the simple basis for how to live life according to Jesus’ words.
I will never figure out this life, my career, relationships, or the exact right theology to profess…but I do know this for certain: that a life lived with love as the source of and reason for everything I do is a life well lived.
How do you keep life simple? I’d love to hear your thoughts!
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I'm taking a big breath, relaxing and ready to 💘. Thanks for the encouragement.
I loved your statement about "a life lived with lovea s the source and reason for everything you do, is a life well lived." Know that you are loved BIG TIME!