Thank you, Mark for sharing this. I wonder why Christians (and others for that matter) seem to be "stingy with their love for other people". Especially when it says in the bible "to love your neighbor as yourself" and "to hate the sin but love the sinner". I guess it has to do with the conditional love (if at all) most of us grew up with, all those conditions that had to be fulfilled in order to be liked or at elast not picked on so much.
According to trauma therapists most of us have a hard time receiving love because we weren´t loved unconditionally as children. And I also wonder how many of us have actually been blessed with experiencing God´s love, I mean to actually really feel it. I so long for having that experience. So, if you don´t have that and did not feel loved as a child, it will be hard to give love to others (and yourself).
And if you don´t understand childhood trauma, you do not understand the consequences it will have later in life (e.g. addiction) and keep telling people "to get their act together" instead of being willing to listen to their life story of what happened to them. Gabor Maté´s book "In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts" is an eye-opener and much recommended reading, as it offers a different perspective thus leading to compassion - for oneself and others. And out of that compassion, love might eventually come through.
Thank you, Mark for sharing this. I wonder why Christians (and others for that matter) seem to be "stingy with their love for other people". Especially when it says in the bible "to love your neighbor as yourself" and "to hate the sin but love the sinner". I guess it has to do with the conditional love (if at all) most of us grew up with, all those conditions that had to be fulfilled in order to be liked or at elast not picked on so much.
According to trauma therapists most of us have a hard time receiving love because we weren´t loved unconditionally as children. And I also wonder how many of us have actually been blessed with experiencing God´s love, I mean to actually really feel it. I so long for having that experience. So, if you don´t have that and did not feel loved as a child, it will be hard to give love to others (and yourself).
And if you don´t understand childhood trauma, you do not understand the consequences it will have later in life (e.g. addiction) and keep telling people "to get their act together" instead of being willing to listen to their life story of what happened to them. Gabor Maté´s book "In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts" is an eye-opener and much recommended reading, as it offers a different perspective thus leading to compassion - for oneself and others. And out of that compassion, love might eventually come through.